Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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