YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
