make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
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