i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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