I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send help, water and tortillas.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize