Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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