It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
My penis needs a shock collar
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize