He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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