No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
