The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
