How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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