the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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