I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Randomize
