Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
Randomize
