it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
