i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
