I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
