Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
