I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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