You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Randomize
