My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He better not be in your backpack
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Randomize
