"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
