My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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