I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize