yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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