He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
