I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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