My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
