8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize