Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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