Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
