I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize