oh god the rape fog is back!
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
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