I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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