I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
