I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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