I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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