so explain again why im purple
no
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
