shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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