So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Randomize
