Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Randomize