u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
