so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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