Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
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Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
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I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
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