just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
