No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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