Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize