i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
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I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
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She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.