what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...