i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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