Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
you never un-have a 4some
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
