There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Sorry my hands just texted you
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
